Upgrade from a girlfriend to a wife

>
>A software Engineer writes ...
>Subject : Upgrade from a girlfriend to a wife
>
Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0
>and noticed that the new program began unexpected
>child processing that took up a lot of space and
>valuable resources. No mention of this phenomenon
>was included in the product brochure.
>In addition, Wife 1.0 installs itself into all other
>programs and launches during system initialization,
>where it monitors all other system activity.
>applications such as Smoking 10.3, Boozing 2.5 and
>Saturday Night Pubs 5.0 no longer run, crashing the
>system whenever selected. I can not to keep Wife 1.0
>in the background while attempting to run some of my
>other favorite applications like Night Club 4.3, Dance
>'n'Drunk 2.0 and Bachelor Party 7.77.
>I am thinking about going back to Girlfriend 7.0, but
>the UN-install does not work on this program. Once I
>tried to uninstall Wife 1.0 but got this error
>=22General Protection Fault in module House Security.
>The Uninstallation will abort.=22
>Can you help me, please=21=21=21
>-----------------------------
>A reply ...
>Dear Software Engineer,
>Ref : Upgrade from a girlfriend to a wife
>This is a very common problem men complain about, but
>is mostly due to a primary misconception. Many people
>upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife1.0 with the idea
>that Wife 1.0 is merely a UTILITIES & ENTERTAINMENT
>program. Wife 1.0 is actually an OPERATING SYSTEM and
>designed by its creator to run everything. It is
>unlikely you would be able to purge Wife 1.0 and
>still convert back to Girlfriend 7.0. It is impossible
>to UN-install, delete, or purge Wife 1.0 from the
>system once installed.
>You can not go back to Girlfriend 7.0 because Wife 1.0
>is not designed to do this. Some have tried to install
>Girlfriend 8.0 or Wife 2.0 but end up with more
>problems than the original system. Look in your manual
>under =22Warnings-Alimony/Child Support=22 which was given
>to you at the time of registration with Wife 1.0.
>I recommend you keep Wife 1.0 and just deal with the
>situation. Having Wife 1.0 installed myself, I might
>also suggest you read the entire section regarding
>General Partnership Faults (GPFs). The best course of
>action will be to enter the command C:=5C APOLOGIZE.
>Infact I would suggest u to use this command everytime
>Wife 1.0 crashes on your system. Wife 1.0 is a great
>program, but very high maintenance. Consider buying
>additional software to improve the performance of Wife
>1.0. I recommend Flowers 2.1 and Chocolates 5.0 or
> Movies 4.5 which will improve the performance of Wife1.0.
>Do not, under any circumstances, install Visual
>Secretary With Short Skirt 3.3. This is not a
>supported application for Wife 1.0 and is likely to
>cause irreversible damage to the operating system.
>Recent Survey says that Add-On software's like Visual
>Saree 2.0, Diamond Necklace3.0, Holidays 1.0 are the
>best Third Party tools that supports Wife 1.0 program
>to run smoothly and effectively.